7 Reasons why guys can be commitment phobic ‘In a relationship’ is a facebook status not flaunted by many men.
But the girls are always quite happy to say that they are in a committed relationship. Why is ‘commitment’ a sign of danger for most men? Why can’t they be open to being committed and serious with the one woman they like a lot? Are guys losing trust with relationships or are they looking for just something casual? Whatever it may be, it certainly bothers the girls. And can often lead to a break up.
Let’s look at a few reasons why your boyfriend is not committing:
Maybe it is you who is pressuring him a lot and he is not ready as yet. Your pressure might not really help him commit but surely will push him away. It is best for it to happen naturally. If it has been just a few weeks since you both are dating, it is still early to commit to anything. Some men can even take up to a year to realize that you might be the one.
Parents influence
It can be that his parents did not have a very good marriage and are separated or divorced. He must have seen them fighting and arguing all his childhood and this has altered his perception about relationships or marriage. Childhood experiences often shape the thoughts one has in their adult life. It is not really his fault in this case and it is best to give him more time to be open for a commitment.
Friend circle
He must be having friends who have not committed as yet and still enjoy singlehood. Being the first one among your friends to commit can often be scary and overwhelming for men. Guys often make fun of each other and their relationships casually. Also, he might be afraid of the ridicule that his guy friends would poke at him if he opened up about serious love and his girlfriend.
Afraid of restrictions
Men don’t like restrictions. And women are often known to impose things. Because of this stereotypical thought about women, men can be afraid that they will have to comply with their girlfriends or wives say, lifelong. This can mean like the end of ‘freedom’ for them, which is a terrifying thought in the male brain.
Not eager to adjust
Some men need all the space they can get. They don’t like sharing their room, their phones or any such personal thing. They might not like anyone else; but they love their free time and space more than anyone else. He might love his video games and his lazy boy recliner much more than you. Such men don’t like changes and are not eager to adjust for anyone.
He’s a player
This one is the worst case. A guy can often two-time or multiple time women, without committing to any one in particular. If he is not committing anything to you and is also flirting with other women, it is just that he is a player and doesn’t probably believe in ‘the one’. He is seeing you casually, just as he is seeing several other women probably .If you are okay with that, you should carry on. But if not, it is best to dump him as he won’t commit any soon!
Previous bad experience
He might have had a really bad long term relationship or marriage. A failed relationship can be quite traumatic. This can change his perception about women and how things work in a relationship. Everyone’s ex has a great impact on their mind and more so, if it was she who dumped him. It can also be that he is still not over her yet.
It is not the time yet
Maybe it is you who is pressuring him a lot and he is not ready as yet. Your pressure might not really help him commit but surely will push him away. It is best for it to happen naturally. If it has been just a few weeks since you both are dating, it is still early to commit to anything. Some men can even take up to a year to realize that you might be the one.
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